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This milestone snuck up on me, I remember I was so excited for the 100 day mark (in fact I blogged about it) & now this “I’ve quit drinking” thing, it feels normal most of the time.
It’s amazed me how much more ‘me’ I could feel. It took a few months to settle in and a few more to feel a real difference but now, now I feel more like me than ever.
Last week In Love with a Stranger came on and I realised the stranger I was associating with was myself. I have been, at times, a stranger to myself. I am a me I’ve never met before but me all the same. The stories that I’ve told myself about me, that have linked together to make me, that have formed other peoples opinions of me … they don’t fit who I am any more.
I’m more comfortable in my skin, I know myself in ways I didn’t when my go to solution was wine. I’ve got better at looking after myself and better at managing my anxiety (again, much easier without the wine & additional hungover fear).
It’s not for everyone but I wish I knew two years ago, a year ago, 201 days ago what I know now. I wish I knew that once I’d pushed through a few awkward meals and odd conversations, the sober first date & the first few ‘terrible’ days that things would be so much better. That I would feel so much better. That not drinking isn’t the most terrible thing in the world, that it’s an eye opening adventure and I am not – and have never been – alone in it.
One of the best things I did in those early days (and the thing that made this different from all the stop/start times before) was to create this blog & my ‘gram to talk about it. I stopped hiding what I was trying to do, I started talking & writing about it & the support … the support from all of you – from the communities on Facebook, on Instagram and those who read my blog, I couldn’t ask for more.
Not every day is roses but today, today is pretty good.
If you want to know more, I wrote a much more detailed post on stopping drinking: How to stop drinking? 7 things that might help
ps. 2021 update: I’m now over four years sober!
pps. If you need more support, contact your GP and consider the services of a detox clinic.
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