5 things I’m doing to be better with money

5 things I'm doing to be better with money

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Stopping drinking, an instant clarity pill but not the quick fix to an entire life overhaul one may hope – my life is much much better but getting better with money is now high on my priorities.

For me, binge drinking went hand in hand with binge spending. It seemed easier to bury my head in the sand and spend on my credit cards than feel my feelings and process why I felt the urge to buy that new top, holiday or five books.

For me a new top isn’t a new top – it’s a new me. New outfits, hair cut, make up – a chance to reinvent myself – convinced that who I am wasn’t enough, that new purchase would enable me to be a whole new person …

Had a bad day? Change my look. A terrible break up? Well a different haircut could solve that. I thought that if I could change myself, my appearance, my weight, my location, my emotional state, my happiness, would improve.

Spending, like drinking, was a plaster I would stick on top of the feelings I did not want to process.

So stopping drinking was the first step I took towards loving myself more, towards focusing on my inner self worth, rather than my outer appearance.

Four months in and taking responsibility for myself now feels natural (most days). A sentence I never thought I’d write. Self care feels almost normal, a prerequisite and my go-to. I understand that I need to take time out for me, that I come first and that if I don’t put myself first then who else will.

Facing my finances feels like a natural progression here. I’ve started to become more aware of myself, of my actions and the way I spend has been on my mind of late.

Feeling safe and supported are key for my wellbeing. Financially I’d like to feel safe and supported also. Conscious spending, and financial security that is my end goal.

This isn’t a pay off £80,000 in debt in a year post. These are my early days, gentle steps, assessing the situation.

Here are the 5 things I’m doing to be better with money:

1. Reading and learning about conscious finances and money

This is where my journey really started, the steps that follow on from here all began with the books I read about money.

I started with some of the usuals: The Millionaire’s Mind & I will teach you to be rich, but whilst they outlaid strategies to manage finances, they didn’t teach me to manage my own emotions around money and thus whilst I always came out with a plan – I never quite managed to put that plan into action.

And then I read Kate Northrup’s Money: A Love Story (I wrote about it, as well as 12 other books that changed my life here) – and I felt my attitude towards money begin to shift. The stories and anecdotes in Kate’s book are fantastic but what really helped me in this book were the step-by-step exercises that address both the emotional and practical aspects of your financial life (more on that later).

Reading has been helping me to shift my beliefs about money, and see that their are other perspectives beyond mine in managing money and finances. create a budget, spend in line with your values, get out of debt and so much more.

2.Exploring my beliefs on money

Money: A Love Story began this work for me, encouraging me to explore my feelings around money and what emotions think about spending, saving and earning brought up.

Figuring out my personal perceptions of money and wealth is helping me cultivate awareness to be able to change my beliefs for the better.

It’s the beginning of my money journey, not the end – but I feel inspired when I consider my beliefs & not depressed at my situation and that was a very positive shift for me!!

3. Morning affirmations & a money meditation

From yet more books I have read, many affirmations around wealth and money have come up. Affirmations work for me, they give me a point of focus and set me up for the day. So if you are sceptical I get it, but give it a try …

I’ve chosen a few that work for me and (try to) speak them every morning. Here’s a few to work with:

I rejoice in the abundance that I am.
I am full of the richness of life
I am grateful for all the wealth in my life
I am worthy of prosperity and wealth
I choose prosperity and wealth
I am open to receiving abundance so that I may share it with the world,

Recently I’ve added to this work with a meditation focusing on abundance and being a Rich Witch, a lot of the work I’ve been doing has been influenced by Lara Rose Duong – The Modern Money Witch – and her Rich Witch vibes. I downloaded her free meditation & have been listening to it in the evenings.

4. Setting financial goals

This is where I used to fall down. I’d set a budget, and then swiftly overspend. Or I’d set goals that were totally unachievable. Now I have one goal, and it sits amongst my other goals.

I goal set in the present tense, as recommended in Jody Shield’s Life Tonic – a book I’m reading at the moment and highly recommend – and focus on how the goal will make me feel:

I am financially free
– I feel supported and able to pursue my purpose and passions

5. Buying a new purse

Here’s the fun bit! I’m going to buy a new purse to start my new financial journey.

I’ve cleared out everything I don’t need from the old one so I can focus on all of the positive ways wealth and abundance make me feel.

I’m going to choose a purse I love and make my wallet a money magnet following these two articles from The Numinous:

HOW TO MAKE AN ABUNDANCE ALTAR IN YOUR WALLET

MAKE YOUR WALLET A MONEY MAGNET

A bit of a different post on money, but a positive one I hope. My next steps will be to set a budget and I have started using my new Monzo card to see where my money goes – but, like with drinking, I am trying very hard to approach this new focus on money with positivity and as an opportunity to learn and grow, rather than berating myself for how much debt I am in or seeing myself as a failure for not starting sooner.

How do you manage your money? Any practices you can share to help me?

As always, I’d love to hear from you: comment below, send me an email or chat to me on instagram.

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17 Comments

  1. April 28, 2017 / 9:11 AM

    Great post, will re read and take lots of notes for myself! #thatfridaylinky

  2. April 28, 2017 / 10:24 AM

    I like the idea of actually reflecting on money as a concept and thinking about your feeling towards it. Good idea. I’m quite bad for just buying what I want but ultimately, I do have to sit and think first…it is worth it? xx #thatfridaylinky

  3. April 28, 2017 / 3:21 PM

    Ok I needed to read this, I’m like the polar opposite travelling in the other direction. I used to be super stingy and really tight on spending money meaning I wouldn’t let myself have a good time and enjoy things, now i’m starting to be a bit more loose about it and starting to be a little bit more reckless with spending – this brought me a little more down to earth and made me recognise that I need to strike a balance. Thank you for your honesty about your struggles it really does help readers and it’s amazing that you are so vulnerable for your readers.
    Kate || http://www.katerattley.com

  4. April 28, 2017 / 4:16 PM

    Glad to hear you are getting your habits under control. The more you get your finances under control the more you have to bless others with.

  5. Kiki
    April 28, 2017 / 11:01 PM

    Such an informative post, thank you for sharing your tips. I always have an impulsive splurge when I know I have money to burn. Normally I’m really careful with money but lately I’ve been like that guy in Brewster’s Million – practically throwing it away! #thatfridaylinky

  6. April 29, 2017 / 2:02 PM

    Love buying a new purse! These are great tips! #FriYAYlinky

  7. April 29, 2017 / 7:02 PM

    It sounds like you’re taking steps in the right direction. Great tips. Thanks for linking up to #ThatFridayLinky

  8. Siobhan
    April 30, 2017 / 9:04 AM

    Brilliant. This is so timely for me. I have been continuing to overspend since stopping drinking… Buying rewards for myself, distracting myself etc. Going to reread carefully and really focus on this area this month. Thank you xx

  9. April 30, 2017 / 10:20 AM

    Thanks for these tips, I definitely could use some wisdom in the finance department. Will go back and look at the links and might read the first book you mentioned! #blogcrush

  10. May 1, 2017 / 12:43 PM

    These are great tips! Thank you! Definitely sounds like you are heading in the right direction. x

  11. Nige
    May 1, 2017 / 3:30 PM

    Fab tips here it’s so easy to keep spending good luck Thanks for linking to the #THAT FRIDAY LINKY come back next week please

  12. May 3, 2017 / 8:52 PM

    Hi, great tips I shall be taking a look at the links. Enjoy your new purse #BrilliantBlogPosts

  13. May 3, 2017 / 10:20 PM

    Wow, this is brilliantly written and has so much good information too. I need to come back to it because I want to read through all the parts you referenced too (and I need to go to bed now!), but I just know they are going to be equally helpful and inspiring. So glad to have found you via #FriYay Linky

  14. May 4, 2017 / 8:45 PM

    These are very useful tips, I love those affirmations. I definitely think I need to reign my spending in and I do find myself spending more money if my mood is low to try and cheer myself up. Thanks for linking to #BlogCrush xx

  15. May 5, 2017 / 9:02 PM

    Great advice and really lovely ways of looking at it all. Thanks for sharing #friyaylinky xx

  16. August 8, 2017 / 6:10 PM

    When I turned 18 I got myself a load of store cards and credit cards and bought what I wanted for a year. I would buy a whole new outfit every time I went out partying, which was several times a week, and would buy rounds for everyone through my fear of people not really liking me. By the age of 19 I was £17500 in debt and in ‘debt crisis’ not being able to pay anything off and using credit from one place to pay of another and vice versa. I spent 5 years on a debt management plan and paid it all back. It was the silliest thing I ever did, but I also learnt a lot from it. I’m much wiser with my money now and only borrow what I can afford to pay back and if it’s necessary e.g my mortgage. Being in a lot of personal debt can be a dark place to be, but there is also light at the end of the tunnel and it’s totally possible to turn it all around.

  17. August 21, 2017 / 12:18 AM

    Really interesting post full of useful tips. Thanks for linking up too!

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